Wish You Were Here
by lucyydragneel
Summary: Finally, my love came back to me and I couldn't be happier. NaLu one-shot!


**A/N: Hey guys, so this one-shot is based upon the song _Wish You Were Here_ by Avril Lavigne. (Lucy P.O.V. btw) Enjoy!**

* * *

 _Wish You Were Here_

It's been about six months since Natsu took that solo mission. It was only supposed to take about a week and we haven't seen him since. I told myself that when he came back I would confess to him, but he never came home. We went and searched for him but we always came up empty handed. Ever since my last shred of hope had been ripped away from me, I've been completely devastated. I never go out anymore, I don't go to the guild or hang out with anyone. Levy's been going on jobs and paying my rent for me because I won't even leave my bed. My best friend could be dead and I can't do anything about it. Natsu showed me what it was like to live, have friends, have a family and to be wanted. Without him, my life has no meaning.

There is a huge holiday party tonight at the guild and Levy is dragging me because everyone misses me. It would be a lie to say I didn't miss them as well but, I don't want to go. This is my first Christmas without Natsu and Happy. I have no idea what I'm going to do. I heard someone knock on my door so I got up and opened it to see Levy standing there.

"Hi Lu-chan, I'm going to help you get ready... okay?" Levy said. I nodded my head and let her in. She went into my room and into my closet. She picked out this pretty short white lacey dress that Natsu helped me pick out for this party months prior. It's a little vintage looking which I absolutely love. She then picks out Ivory peep-toe platform pumps that we bought at a wedding store because every other store had terrible shoes. They even have a pretty crystal bow on the side and they were really expensive.

"Lu-chan, put this stuff on please?" Levy asks sweetly. I walk over to her and take the stuff from her. I walk into the bathroom and get changed. I walk out of the bathroom and a Levy gasps.

"What? Does it look bad?" I ask her looking at my attire. She runs up to me and hugs me.

"No! Lu-chan you look so beautiful!" Levy says.

"Thank you, Levy-chan." I smile at her. She pulls away and she starts to get ready as well. I walk over to my vanity and do my hair and makeup. I just French braid my bangs and pin them to the side of my head. I curl my hair and I put hair spray in it. I put on a lot of black eyeliner to hide some on the bags under my eyes and then I just put on mascara. I didn't feel like wearing any makeup so that's all I put on.

Levy finished getting ready after me and she looked so pretty. She wore a short strapless dress where the top half was white with sparkles and the rest was royal red. He shoes were Ivory and her hair was semi-curled with a red headband.

"You look beautiful, Levy-chan." I told her. She smiled and dragged me to the guild.

When we walked in, everyone started to freak out and run towards me. I was then pulled into a huge hug and it was nice. They pulled away and I walked up to the bar where Mira was. As I was walking up there, I passed the table Natsu, Happy and I used to sit at every day. I frowned for a second but then I remembered that I had to look happy for everyone else.

Mira smiled at me when I finally walked up to the bar.

"You look very pretty, Lucy!" Mira said. I nodded and thanked her. She handed me a strawberry shake and we talked for a little while.

While I was talking to Mira, Lisanna was talking to Erza about something. I tuned Mira out for a minute and listened to the other conversation. Erza and Lisanna were talking about Natsu and Lisanna said that she felt sorry for me. I was trying to avoid that subject all night and now it was right in front of me. I quickly stood up and Mira looked at me curiously. I started walking out of the guild and only one person seemed to notice.

"Hey Lucy, where are you going?" Lisanna asked me. I glared at her.

"Home." I stated. She smiled at me.

"Oh, okay. Look... I'm really so-..." She didn't get to finish because I ran out of the guild. I knew what she was going to say and I didn't want to hear it.

* * *

As I was running home it started to snow and get really cold. I honestly didn't care because I didn't care about anything anymore. I finally made it home and took the dress off and threw it on the floor. I put on a long lacey black tank top and threw my shoes in the closet. I undid the braid and brushed my hair out. I shut off all of the lights. I turned on the radio and my favorite song came on so I started to sing.

 _I can be tough_

 _I can be strong_

 _But with you it's not like that at all_

As I sang I started to throw all the papers off of my desk and started to destroy my whole room.

 _There's a girl_

 _That gives a shit_

 _Behind this wall_

 _You just walk through it_

I threw the chair across the room and kicked the desk over so everything flew everywhere.

 _And I remember all those crazy thing you said_

 _You left them running through my head_

 _You're always there, you're everywhere_

 _But right now I wish you were here_

I flipped the couch over and started throwing all of my books around the room.

 _All those crazy things we did_

 _Didn't think about it just went with it_

 _You're always there, you're everywhere_

 _But right now I wish you were here_

I threw all of the stuff on top of my dresser on the floor and broke my vanity mirror with my hands.

 _Damn, Damn, Damn_

 _What I'd do to have you here, here, here_

 _I wish you were here_

I looked at my bleeding hands and laughed before I flipped the whole vanity over and everything fell out.

 _Damn, Damn, Damn_

 _What I'd do to have you near, near, near_

 _I wish you were here_

I broke all of my perfume bottle and that made me bleed even more. I flipped the table over and threw all of the chairs into the wall.

 _I love_

 _The way you are_

 _It's who I am_

 _Don't have to try hard_

By this time I was crying so much that tears were making it harder and harder to see. The black eyeliner and mascara dripped down my face along with the tears I've held back for so long.

 _We always say_

 _Say it like it is_

 _And the truth_

 _Is that I really mi-i-iss_

I ripped the blankets off my bed and threw all of the pillows across the room.

 _All those crazy things you said_

 _You left them running through my head_

 _You're always there, you're everywhere_

 _But right now I wish you were here._

I ran into the bathroom and threw the towels onto the floor and threw all of the plants and bath products onto the floor.

 _All those crazy things we did_

 _Didn't think about it, just went with it_

 _You're always there, you're everywhere_

 _But right now I wish you were here_

I walked to the counter and looked into the mirror and I looked horrible. I got so angry again and broke the mirror and made my hands bleed even more.

 _Damn, Damn, Damn,_

 _What I'd do to have you_

 _Here, here, here_

 _I wish you were here._

I ran back into my room and threw all of the plants out the window before running into the kitchen.

 _Damn, Damn, Damn_

 _What I'd do to have you_

 _Near, near, near_

 _I wish you were here._

I took the largest knife from the kitchen and walked back into my room. I placed it on my bed and continued destroying everything.

 _No, I don't wanna let go_

 _I just wanna let you know_

 _That I never wanna let go (x2)_

I took the pictures of my mother and father and smashed them with my hands. Some of the glass got stuck in my hands but I didn't care.

 _Damn, Damn, Damn,_

 _What I'd do to have you_

 _Here, here, here_

 _I wish you were here_

I walked into my closet and ripped the dress Natsu picked for me to shreds and everything I ever wore around him too.

 _Damn, Damn, Damn_

 _What I'd do to have you_

 _Near, near, near_

 _I wish you were here._

I found my letter box on the floor and ripped every single one because I knew they involved Natsu. I was crying and bleeding so much and I didn't care.

 _Damn, Damn, Damn_

 _What I'd do to have you_

 _Here, here, here_

 _I wish you were here._

I found pictures of Natsu and me. I smashed every single one of them and the frames were covered in my own blood...my black tears stained all of the pictures.

 _Damn, Damn, Damn_

 _What I'd do to have you_

 _Near, near, near_

 _I wish you were here._

I finally stopped and looked around my apartment and it was completely destroyed. I walked over to my bed and grabbed the knife. I put it back in the kitchen after thinking what I was about to do was not a good idea. I walked back into my room and I saw a letter that Natsu wrote me years ago. I started to think about all of our adventures and I started freaking out again.

I crawled over to my fallen vanity and grabbed a mirror piece. I whispered goodbye to the guild and cut my arm really deep. I lied there for what felt like hours waiting for the end. I was still crying and my face had black makeup smears all over it.

"Hey, why is it so dark in here?" I heard someone say so I looked up at the window and my eyes widened in shock.

"N-Natsu...?" I whispered. The figure walked towards me and realized all off my stuff on the floor. The figure ran over and turned on the lights. It was him... it was Natsu.

"LUCY? WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!" He yelled at me. I just smiled before I realized that I was basically dying.

"I-I w-was u-upset..." I said as I felt my eyelids get heavy. He rushed towards me and looked at me.

"Why?" He questioned. I looked at him in disbelief.

"I-I d-didn't w-want t-to l-let y-you g-go." I whispered as my eyes slid closed and I was ready for the end. He looked at me and saw my bleeding arm. He glared at me and picked me up before he jumped out the window. He ran down the street so fast that everything went past us in a snowy blur. I realized that he brought me to Porlyusica's house and knocked on her door like crazy. She finally opened and gasped.

"Quickly! Lie her on the bed and I'll start healing her right away." Porlyusica said.

Natsu held my hand as she helped fix my wounds and save my life. I eventually lost consciousness and I don't remember what else happened.

* * *

When I woke up I was in my room and everything was all cleaned up. Maybe that was a dream? I sat up and looked next to me and saw Natsu sitting in my desk chair glaring at me. I gulped in fear and I realized that what happened was not a dream and it was real.

"Luce... WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Natsu yelled at me... again. I looked down at my bandaged arm and thought about last night's events. I started to feel tears slide down my face. I touched my cheeks and saw that the tears were black and I felt rage again like I did last night.

"What's wrong with me? What is wrong with _you?"_ I glared daggers into him. He looked a little taken back before glaring again.

"I didn't just try to kill myself, Lucy!" He exclaimed. I scoffed and wiped away my tears before standing up and running into the bathroom.

I looked in the mirror and I looked as bad as I did last night. All of my makeup was still smeared all over my face and I looked pained. I saw that the mirror has been fixed, probably by magic. I smiled and heard him knock on the door.

"Lucy, get out here now so I can talk to you." He demanded. I laughed and looked back at the mirror.

"Oh, so you own me now... Dragneel?" I asked him wickedly. I heard him growl.

"Open this door now or I will burn it down." He stated. I put my hand on the mirror and then I punched it because I was so mad. I slid to the ground and stared at my bloody hand.

I looked at the now burned door and there was a very angry Natsu standing there. He walked towards me and grabbed my hands but, I pulled them away.

"Don't. Touch. Me." I said coldly. Honestly I have no idea why I was acting like this and obviously Natsu didn't like it. He wrapped my hand in cloth before he picked me up and threw me onto my bed. He pinned me under him so I couldn't move.

"What are you doing, Luce?" He asked me normally. I looked at him and sighed.

"I was having a hard time and I needed to relieve some anger and sadness. I trashed this whole place and everything that reminded me of..." I trailed off. He looked at me.

"Of what?" He asked me. I looked into his eyes.

"You." I whispered before looking away. He grabbed my face and made me look into his eyes.

"Why Lucy? Why would you do that?" He asked curiously. I weakly smiled at him.

"You went on a mission and then you never came back. Do you even get how devastated I was?" I whispered. He sighed.

"I'm sorry Lucy. Really I am, I had no idea that I was going to be away for so long. After I finished the mission I decided to train and I sent a letter to gramps but…I guess he never got it." He said with regret laced in his voice.

"Its okay, Natsu. I just... kinda freaked out last night. I turned on the radio and a song that said exactly how I felt came on and I freaked out more than I already was. You were my first friend and my first best friend. Having you here with me every day and then not having you at all was extremely hard. I thought you died because we looked everywhere for you and found nothing. I lost all hope of your return and last night at the Christmas party, was the first time I've been to the guild in over five months. Everyone was talking about how they pitied me and I couldn't take it. So I went home to destroy everything I owned before I ended it all." I said and he looked at me angrily.

"Why would you even do that? Do I even mean that much to you...?" He whispered.

"Natsu... you mean everything to me. Without you I have no idea how to live." I said. He looked at me and smiled.

"Me too Luce. Without you around made training even harder, but I knew when I came back I could finally see you." He smiled at me and my heart skipped a beat.

"Umm... Natsu? I have to tell you something." I said nervously. He looked at me and nodded. "I was going to tell you when you came back from the mission but I guess I'll tell you now..." I trailed off.

"Well... what is it?" He asked me. I took a deep breathe before replying.

"Natsu... I-I'm in l-love w-with you..." I whispered and I knew he heard me. I looked away from him but he grabbed my face again and looked me in the eyes.

"That's kind of funny..." He said. I started to get upset but he continued. "Because I'm so in love with you, Lucy Heartfilia." He said. I gasped because I was shocked.

He bent down and kissed me passionately and I melted into the kiss. He pulled away and smiled.

"Please... don't ever do that to yourself ever again. Please?" He asked me. I nodded. "Because if you died... I would die too." He said. I smiled and I touched his cheek.

"Don't worry... I'm not going anywhere anytime soon." I smiled at him.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" Natsu asked me. I smiled and nodded.

"Would you ever marry me?" I asked him. He looked at me and smiled.

"Well I would marry you right now if I could but I don't know if you want that." he said sheepishly.

"Okay." I said. He looked at me confusion in his eyes. "I would marry you right now too…dummy." I said.

"Okay. Lucy Heartfilia, will you do me the honor of being my wife?" He asked me.

"Yes." I smiled. He kissed me and I pulled away first. "Forever?" I asked him.

"Forever is too short... how about for all of eternity? It kind of sounds spooky too." He joked. I stuck my tongue out at him and smiled.

"Okay fine... eternity is a long long time. But I'll love you longer than that." I said.

"So infinity then?" He said smugly. I smiled and hummed in agreement.

"I love you." I said.

"I love you more." Natsu said. I nodded and yawned. I felt really tired all of a sudden and I eventually fell asleep with Natsu right by my side.

* * *

 _Finally, my love came back to me and I couldn't be happier._

* * *

 **A/N: Hey guys, kinda sad but I had to write about it. I'm really tired so sorry if it isn't that great :( I definitely don't condone with harming yourselves and suicide! Anyway leave me a review or fav/follow and let me know what you all think. Until next time... bye: D**


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